Blog 15: Last Blog

       As the semester comes to an end, writing class has helped me improve my writing skills. Some of my goals at the beginning of the semester, were that I wanted to used strong facts and be able to support them. I described how I wanted to take my writing one step further by explaining things in a more detailed way.  Although, I have made some progress in these things there is much more than I can improve on.  On my essays I noticed that I included strong points and details regarding the subject. But one of my mistakes is that I don’t keep the essays focused. I tend to use details but do not place them in the appropriate paragraph. I can make my essays better by clarifying my ideas and not be redundant.  A goal I have accomplished is that I am able to write strong thesis according to the subject of my essay.  But I can still have to work on relating my points to my thesis and be able to support the thesis I am writing bout. A thing I became better at is doing different writing strategies of how to start an essay. For instance, before I would just start writing but now I take time to make an outline or free write before starting an essay.  I would like to continue to grow as a writer, by writing essays that have a good thesis but is also supported by facts and strong details. Now, I am going to try to question each paragraph I write. In order, to make sure each paragraph is placed where it should be.  Overall, I believe I made progress in writing because each essay I wrote had more positive feedback.

Blog #14

For my portfolio, I plan to revise my argumentative essay. The strengths of my essay were that I effectively use details to summarize Murray’s article. I also address good points about the main idea of the article. Another strength in my essay is that my essay follows an order. The weaknesses of my essay were that it wasn’t focused or paragraphs weren’t clarified. For instance, in one of the analysis paragraph I used a good point but it doesn’t tie to the thesis. I also don’t use transitions to show the difference of each paragraph. A mistake I make in my essay is that I don’t tie my main points in my thesis.

In order to make my essay more effective, I am going to better focus my essay. I am going to develop my ideas more clear. I am going to make sure all my points relate to my thesis and are arranged in logical order. In my essay I also don’t explain in more detail my points so, this is what I am going to change. This essay includes a summary, analysis, and my opinion. Throughout, the essay I am going to use better transitions. This will make my essay more effective because the transitions are going to show how each paragraph is different. By making these corrections the reader is going to have a better understanding of my main point and view towards Murray’s article.

Blog 13 Argument Essays

I analyzed Charles Murray essay “Should the Obama Generation Drop Out” where he addresses different thesis in his argument. For example, one of his thesis is “It’s what you can do that should count when you apply for a job, not where you learned to do it”.  Furthermore, in his essay he also includes a thesis of how students aren’t smart enough to do college work. This taught me how to be able to integrate more than one thesis in my essay. But I have to be very careful in my thesis because it has to refer to my argument essay.

            In his argument I also noticed that he address only one side of the matter. Murray doesn’t talk about the impact his preposition can have and how it can be a problematic issue. An example is when he ignores the fact that a Bachelors Degree is not worth much. From this I learned that I shouldn’t contradict myself because it weakens the essay. Causing the views of the essay to be problematic can make the argument less effective because it doesn’t give credibility to the person that is writing the essay. The essay should follow steps where the paragraphs follow a logical order and make sense. This will help my essay be understandable when someone reads it. Also addressing the other side of the matter shows that the writer is thinking about both sides and snot just focusing on his opinion.

In the essay Murray uses a serious tone to address white-collar people and college educated students. From this I learned that in my essays I should have a clear tone this would make my essay effective because the person reading the essay is going to know how I feel towards the issue. Addressing a certain audience shows that I know who I am writing too specifically. Knowing the audience you are addressing makes me change the style of writing. For example, if I am writing an essay referring to teenager I can feel more comfortable writing to them. This is because I can relate to them and be in their shoes.

Blog #12

           In my argument essay my topic is going to be about college students and the use of alcohol. The thesis of my essay is, "College campuses should ban the use of alcohol because it makes students get distract while being in class and not perform well in their class”.
            The strongest evidence is my claim because if a student attends class while they had inherit alcohol they don't learn the material. If a person attends class in this stage they are not fully prepare and are not going to pay attention. A person who drinks can even fall asleep or not be conscious of what they are doing. As a result, the students can have lower grades because they are not fully integrated to the material being taught. This is my strongest evidence because I explained the negative outcome of what happens when students attend school while they have had alcohol.
            My weakest evidence of my easy would be my rebuttal because I can't really explain the other side of the topic. Even though drinking can cause many problems, it can also help a student relax even they have a stressing day. To make this a stronger part of my essay I can also talk about how not all students limit the amount of alcohol they inherit. The more a person drinks they are more likely to do inappropriate things. Therefore, even though alcohol can help a person relax it can also increase the chances of causing problems while being in college. This is the weakest part of my essay because I can fully develop the idea of my rebuttal. In other words, in my rebuttal I can address different things but I am not sure which one supports my thesis the best

Blog 11: Patterns of errors

In my writing, I noticed that most of my paragraphs my essays are not well focused. For example, I tend to go off topic when writing essays. I start talking about one thing and end up writing about a different topic. This is an issue on my essays because it makes my essays vague, where I am talking about different subjects. Having unfocused topics makes my essays weak because the body paragraphs don’t tie with the thesis. It is difficult for me to have focused paragraphs because I want to write many things about one subject. This is an error that I repeat constantly, but I am going to read my essays and make them relate to my thesis or essay topic.   

  Another error I make in my writing is that I don’t clarify my sentences and repeat things constantly. For instance, I explain quotes or statements but don’t always make my points clear.  I also don’t explain “why?” in my papers which makes my statements unclear. This type of error makes my papers be redundant where I constantly repeat the words again. I can change this repeated error by questioning every sentence in my essay. The strategy of thinking why I add the a particular sentence in my essay, is going to make me noticed where I don't explain things in details.

 I also noticed in my essays that my thesis are not strong enough or are not specific. When I write essays it’s hard to write my thesis because I tend to make it too wordy. In my thesis, I included words that make my thesis have two different meanings. A thesis describes the main topic of the essays; therefore, I find it difficult to come up with a thesis where I am going to have to relate to it throughout my essays. Even though, I make these mistakes constantly I am going to read my essays multiple times, try not to go off topic, and look for better sentence structure. This is going to make my essays stronger and have my writing focus related to one subject.

Blog 10 Peer Review

Peer review for me is a good strategy for classmates to critic my work. Peer review is effective because it gives us ideas about things to include in essays. For example, one students may have a certain still of writing and the person reading the can take some of those ideas. Another example is that it helps us get ideas that we can include in our writing. It can be improved by having two people per group. This will give us the opportunity to only focus in one piece of writing. Only having to read one essay will give me the chance to speak with my partner in person about the essay. I also feel that the questions should be different each time we review an essay. My strengths as a peer review are that I read the essay in details and make comments on them. I try to identify the grammatical errors they have or write questions mark in ideas that are unclear. One of my weaknesses is that I am not good at giving advice. For instance, I find it difficult to explain to my partners how they can improve. While answering the questions I identify the good and bad things but I believe I can add more details. I can explain better how they can improve on their essay. For me, it is helpful to do review at early stages in writing because we can develop better ideas with the help of our partners. When we are in the process of writing an essay it is easy to move or change ideas around. One can make any corrections and fix with the help of the peer reviewer. I believe that smaller groups would work better because it gives us a better chance to give better critic. Also because we are not going to get distracted having group discussions about different things not related to the essays. The amount of time given in class is sufficient to complete the peer review process. 

Blog 9 my own topic

My goal toward my education is to obtain a Bachelor's Degree. Afterwards I plan to keep going to college for my Masters. Right now that I am in college I am having difficulty choosing my major. There are many majors that I have in mind but don't know which one to choose. Some of them being social workers, or secondary education. I really like working and helping others that's why these are the main careers I am thinking about. This is a crucial part of my life because it is the job that I am going to have all my life, but I really find it hard to choose my career. I am undecided because besides liking my major I have to take into consideration the job opportunities each career has. In order to choose my major I have met with a Career Service Counselor. They are helping me evaluate myself and the things I like. They have also explained to me each major and their advantages and disadvantages. So I hope soon I can declared my major. Overall, I think that whatever major I choose writing classes are really helpful. Writing class helps my goals because I am going to be writing no matter what. The most important piece of writing is going to be my thesis once I graduate. Therefore, writing class are helpful because they make my skills stronger. The advantages are that I am able to have better diction and reading skills in others. Writing is something I am going to do in any major I choose no matter which one it is.

Blog #8 Arguments

The article “Should Obama Generation Drop-Out” is about how students study a four year bachelor’s degree in order to find a job. These are usually students who have a stable economy level or are wealthy. However, there are other students who are looking for well-paying jobs but don’t have enough resources to accomplish this. The writer implies that it is good that hiring jobs pay attention to the certification but it should not be vital to have one. In other words people look for a bachelor’s degree when hiring a person but do not know if they are preparing for this job. In the article the writer mentions Obama to show that he is the main authority. For instance, he is the only one that is able to change things since he is president. The writer suggest that instead at asking for a bachelor's degree do an evaluation of how they get things done.

I choose this article because it was the one that caught my attention first. I am the first generation from my family to attend college. So, this is an issue that I as a student need to be aware of. This issue is important for me because now in days it’s hard to find a well paid job and I have to keep on studying to get the highest degree possible. But I think that there are students that graduate from prestige universities but don’t have the experience for their career. I have noticed that there are people who don’t have the proper education but they do have the capacity to do things that pertain to their jobs. This matters because hiring people judge a person for a written certification but not for what they are able to do.

Blog 7: Reflecting on Progress

We are at the midterm of the semester and time has gone fast. Even though I have only done two essays I believe there is much progress I have to make. I was not satisfied with my graded essay therefore, I need keep improving my writing skills. I believe that as a writer I have to learn how to put my ideas together so they can make sense in my essay. I also need help in not jumping from one idea to another in my narrative. What I like about the Writing 1 is working in groups. This helps me get ideas from another point of view and makes it easier to understand things when I am unsure. I believe the peer review works because my peers get to read my essay and give me feedback of the things that are right or wrong. According to my writing blogs I feel that I am doing great. Writing blogs helps me analyze the work that I do during the week in class. A thing that would facilitate my learning process is having more PowerPoint’s presented in class about things to include in essays. This would help me know what types of details or things to include in my essays. Another thing that would be helpful is to analyze an essay as a class according to the type of essay we have to write. By doing this would help because each student is going to get an idea of how to organize their essay. I think my writing process has changed because now I have many writing strategies of what to do before starting an essay. Overall, there is much work that can be done to improve my writing and write better essays. 

Blog 6

Now, that I am in the process of writing my advertisement essay I can tell there is a great difference between my narrative. First of all the tone is different because in my narrative I was able to choose the tone I wanted. While in the ad essay I am limited to the words I choose to describe how the ad wants the audience to view them. This is because in order to describe tone I have to describe how the ad looks. Another difference is the audience because in my ad the main audience are athletes and people who aspire to make a change and be energetic. However, in my literacy narrative the audience can be any nobody because it is express from my point of view. This way the audiences can get a sense of who I am. The genre is also different because in an ad I am refering to an image while the narrative has a different type of genre. For example, the red bull ad has letters that describe how this energy drink makes people be energetic and do extreme things . The purpose is also different because a narrative is from someones point of view and is a story to be told. While my red bull ad has one purpose. Which is to make people energetic.

Blog 5: Ad.

The purpose of the red bull advertisement is to show that it give people energy. Red bull is an energy drink that helps people become more energetic in their life. In the advertisement it shows that red bull gives you wings. The intended meaning is to show that it gives people a lot of energy but also makes the feel like they are in another place. In the picture is shows a young men in a bike while flying in the air. By this illustration it is proven that red bull for athletic people. Red bull can be also drank by anyone who has many stress in their life and want to be energetic. This advertisement can be compared to other advertisements because all of red bull ads show how people who drink red bull do many extreme things. The energy drinks makes people believe they can reach high things that are impossible. The tome for this advertisement is energetic and enthusiastic. While the men is flying in the air he is extremely happy. But he also has energy to do a sport that makes him feel like he can do anything. Using a energetic and happy tone shows that the energy drink does work. It also fits the advertisement because red bull is intended to make people become more active and that is what the men is doing

Blog 4

Now that I had time to review my rough draft I noticed grammar mistakes. This is something I changed through my essay to make it sound better. While taking my time to re-read my essay I fixed certain sentences because either they were run-on or the past tense was wrong. Getting feedback from my peers help me in knowing what could be done to fix my narrative essay. Therefore, I fix my conclusion by adding more details about my feelings. For example, I added how I feel proud of been bilingual and how it benefits me. My final paper looks different from my rough draft because I added more details. This improved my essay because readers are going to have a better understanding of my taught. Also by adding more details my audience are going to know how difficult it was for me to make the transition to bilingual classes.  I made some revision but I mainly tried to describe everything more vividly. I believe my essay was structure the way I wanted because I start as a child but then talk about how it affected me over the years to be a bilingual person. In order for me to make these changes I took into consideration my peers critic. I tried to fix my conclusion to have a better ending and summarize what I thought. I also re-read my paper out loud to listen to how it sounded. This made me catch any errors or sentences that didn’t make sense. By reading my essay out loud benefit me because I notice I could place sentence in different paragraphs. The strongest part of my essay is my introduction because I describe my childhood and neighborhood. This is important because it draws my audience into my story. By doing this they can put themselves in my shoes and understand me more. My weakest part of my essay is the paragraph where I talk about the test I had to take. I believe I can describe more what the test were about. But I have difficulty writing it in words. I also believe that one weakest part of my essay is tone because it changes throughout my essay. Overall, my first essay is a decent essay that illustrates the person I am.

Blog 3

     Essays can be distinguish by the way it is written or structured. In other words essays should follow a certain structure depending what the topic is about. What distinguish an A essay from a C essay is the way it is written. In other words a well written essay describes the main ideas in order. Therefore, it is easy for the reader to know what is the meaning of the essay. For example, in a compare and contrast essay one cannot have a paragraph where it goes from one comparison to a contrast about the particular topic. By doing this makes the reader not be able to distinguish the difference between the two things being compared.
     Another thing that makes an A paper better is the details used. It is important to use details to make create a more vivid image of the topic writing about. By using details it makes the reader get a better understanding and be able to picture what the essay is about. For instance, if an essay describes a certain person tone, details help the reader get a better picture of that person and their attitude. An essay that lack of details is not good because without details the writer is not able to prove their point. This makes the reader get confuse about the purpose of the essay.
      Lastly, what distinguish a A essay from a C essay it the type of grammar and punctuation. A C essay has constantly grammatical error. These can be words that are difficult to write or understand. These type of essay also have many run-on sentences or coma-splices. Since the writer just start writing he/she may no pay attention to these mistakes. Rather an A essay is well-written with minor grammar mistakes. The sentence structure is used correctly. Overall, an A written essay has everything need to prove someones point or convey a meaning. Whereas a C essays includes these things but lacks of information.
       The one that is hardest for me is using details in my essays. I find it hard to explain in a depth the meaning I am trying to convey. I also find it hard to used different details because I constantly repeat the same words. I feel that in my essays I don't use enough details to prove my point or explain my topic. I think that I can use more details to take my essays one step further and explain in depth.

NEIU Writing I: Assignment #2- Generating Ideas

For my first graded essay I would like to write about the time I took AP English in high school. This class became significant to me because I had the opportunity to write different types of essays. Not only did I had to write essay but I also had to analyse different types of text. While being enrolled in this class made it a challenge for me because while analysing a certain text I didn't understand the meaning of it. This made it difficult for me because I was not able to write an essay that explained in details what the text was about.
This is a good narrative to write about because I can demonstrate how I overcame the my challenges and improve my writing skills. A con for this essay would be that there are many essays that I can talk about.
Another topic I can discuss when in Elementary school I had to make the transition from Spanish to English. During my first years of school I was in bilingual class. When I entered 3rd grade I had to read and write in English. This transition that I had to make made it difficult for me to know what language I preferred.
This is a good topic to discuss about because I can illustrate the difference between these two languages. A con would be that I would not remember in vivid details since this happen at and early age.
A topic I can talk about is the a speech that I analysed and wrote and essay about it. This essay was significant to me because after rewriting it I earn a good grade.
Writing about this topic is good because it shows that as a writer I can feel proud of something I wrote on my own. But then I would not be able to write about how I came to write the well written essay.

NEIU Writing I: Welcome

Of course everyone knows English 101 is a required class that all students have to take in college. In my opinion this class is beneficial to me because I have the opportunity to become a better writer and explore different methods of writing. I have written different types of essays but I want to learn how to write different types of papers. From this class I want to learn how to use dialogue in an appropiate way or have strong facts that support my piece of writing. It is important for me to take this class so I can learn how to explain things in more detailed way. I feel that when I write I don't give a clear thought about my ideas. Therefore, I would like to take my writing one step further by explaining in a more detailed way. One thing that I would like to learn out of this class is to write better compare and contrast essays. These have always been the hardest essays that I have to write because it is diffiuclt to write and explain the similarities of two things. I always jump from one idea to another and don't follow a certain order. Overall, writing is important for me because it is something I practice everyday. This class will help me expand my knowledge in more grammar but also become a better writer.