Blog 7: Reflecting on Progress

We are at the midterm of the semester and time has gone fast. Even though I have only done two essays I believe there is much progress I have to make. I was not satisfied with my graded essay therefore, I need keep improving my writing skills. I believe that as a writer I have to learn how to put my ideas together so they can make sense in my essay. I also need help in not jumping from one idea to another in my narrative. What I like about the Writing 1 is working in groups. This helps me get ideas from another point of view and makes it easier to understand things when I am unsure. I believe the peer review works because my peers get to read my essay and give me feedback of the things that are right or wrong. According to my writing blogs I feel that I am doing great. Writing blogs helps me analyze the work that I do during the week in class. A thing that would facilitate my learning process is having more PowerPoint’s presented in class about things to include in essays. This would help me know what types of details or things to include in my essays. Another thing that would be helpful is to analyze an essay as a class according to the type of essay we have to write. By doing this would help because each student is going to get an idea of how to organize their essay. I think my writing process has changed because now I have many writing strategies of what to do before starting an essay. Overall, there is much work that can be done to improve my writing and write better essays. 

Blog 6

Now, that I am in the process of writing my advertisement essay I can tell there is a great difference between my narrative. First of all the tone is different because in my narrative I was able to choose the tone I wanted. While in the ad essay I am limited to the words I choose to describe how the ad wants the audience to view them. This is because in order to describe tone I have to describe how the ad looks. Another difference is the audience because in my ad the main audience are athletes and people who aspire to make a change and be energetic. However, in my literacy narrative the audience can be any nobody because it is express from my point of view. This way the audiences can get a sense of who I am. The genre is also different because in an ad I am refering to an image while the narrative has a different type of genre. For example, the red bull ad has letters that describe how this energy drink makes people be energetic and do extreme things . The purpose is also different because a narrative is from someones point of view and is a story to be told. While my red bull ad has one purpose. Which is to make people energetic.

Blog 5: Ad.

The purpose of the red bull advertisement is to show that it give people energy. Red bull is an energy drink that helps people become more energetic in their life. In the advertisement it shows that red bull gives you wings. The intended meaning is to show that it gives people a lot of energy but also makes the feel like they are in another place. In the picture is shows a young men in a bike while flying in the air. By this illustration it is proven that red bull for athletic people. Red bull can be also drank by anyone who has many stress in their life and want to be energetic. This advertisement can be compared to other advertisements because all of red bull ads show how people who drink red bull do many extreme things. The energy drinks makes people believe they can reach high things that are impossible. The tome for this advertisement is energetic and enthusiastic. While the men is flying in the air he is extremely happy. But he also has energy to do a sport that makes him feel like he can do anything. Using a energetic and happy tone shows that the energy drink does work. It also fits the advertisement because red bull is intended to make people become more active and that is what the men is doing

Blog 4

Now that I had time to review my rough draft I noticed grammar mistakes. This is something I changed through my essay to make it sound better. While taking my time to re-read my essay I fixed certain sentences because either they were run-on or the past tense was wrong. Getting feedback from my peers help me in knowing what could be done to fix my narrative essay. Therefore, I fix my conclusion by adding more details about my feelings. For example, I added how I feel proud of been bilingual and how it benefits me. My final paper looks different from my rough draft because I added more details. This improved my essay because readers are going to have a better understanding of my taught. Also by adding more details my audience are going to know how difficult it was for me to make the transition to bilingual classes.  I made some revision but I mainly tried to describe everything more vividly. I believe my essay was structure the way I wanted because I start as a child but then talk about how it affected me over the years to be a bilingual person. In order for me to make these changes I took into consideration my peers critic. I tried to fix my conclusion to have a better ending and summarize what I thought. I also re-read my paper out loud to listen to how it sounded. This made me catch any errors or sentences that didn’t make sense. By reading my essay out loud benefit me because I notice I could place sentence in different paragraphs. The strongest part of my essay is my introduction because I describe my childhood and neighborhood. This is important because it draws my audience into my story. By doing this they can put themselves in my shoes and understand me more. My weakest part of my essay is the paragraph where I talk about the test I had to take. I believe I can describe more what the test were about. But I have difficulty writing it in words. I also believe that one weakest part of my essay is tone because it changes throughout my essay. Overall, my first essay is a decent essay that illustrates the person I am.