For my portfolio, I plan to revise
my argumentative essay. The strengths of my essay were that I effectively use
details to summarize Murray’s article. I also address good points about the
main idea of the article. Another strength in my essay is that my essay follows
an order. The weaknesses of my essay were that it wasn’t focused or paragraphs weren’t
clarified. For instance, in one of the analysis paragraph I used a good point
but it doesn’t tie to the thesis. I also don’t use transitions to show the difference
of each paragraph. A mistake I make in my essay is that I don’t tie my main
points in my thesis.
In order to make my essay more effective,
I am going to better focus my essay. I am going to develop my ideas more clear.
I am going to make sure all my points relate to my thesis and are arranged in
logical order. In my essay I also don’t explain in more detail my points so,
this is what I am going to change. This essay includes a summary, analysis, and
my opinion. Throughout, the essay I am going to use better transitions. This
will make my essay more effective because the transitions are going to show how
each paragraph is different. By making these corrections the reader is going to
have a better understanding of my main point and view towards Murray’s article.
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